Burn in hell for your sins? Not on our watch, you won't!
Jezebel Jones & Her Wicked Ways introduces an innovative new product you can use INSTEAD of the sinner's prayer to get the same miraculous results!*
Now you can give your life to God by sprinkling on a little bit of "BORN-EAZE". One application will cover ALL your sins for ALL of eternity. Yes, folks, it's just that EAZE-Y!
Feeling like shithead? Like maybe you should be a better person, but can't be bothered to do it yourself? Well, we've got the answer for you! The simple and cost effective solution is BORN-EAZE!
True Salvation can be yours...in an instant*...with BORN-EAZE!
BORN-EAZE is now available at fine, upstanding Christian retailers everywhere. Ask for it by name. BORN-EAZE!
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
BORN-EAZE, Instant Soul-Cleaning Powder. A little sprinkle and your soul will twinkle, twinkle!
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
* Results may vary. Do not use BORN-EAZE with alcohol, fornication, homosexuality or liberalism. BORN-EAZE may be more effective when combined with power, greed and civil rights violations. Jezebel Jones & Her WIcked Ways are not responsible for any adverse reactions to BORN-EAZE. Use at your own risk.